A year with out a friend...Remembering Noey

It’s been a year since my dear friend Noey took his life. Noey was one of the most interesting and unforgettable people I’ve ever met. His smile was infectious, and his personality was both charming and brilliant. He was gifted in so many ways—especially as a master mechanic. There was nothing he couldn’t fix. And if he didn’t know how, he could always figure it out. His knowledge spanned countless topics, too many to mention.

Our friendship began many years ago when we met at church in Bakersfield, CA. We bonded over our shared love for photography, off-roading, the Bible, and even a little football. We didn’t spend a lot of time together in person, but we often connected over the phone. He’d call me during his long drives from Bakersfield to San Diego, picking up his daughter for their weekend visits. I only wish I had answered his calls more often.

Noey had strong opinions on many things. He shared with me his joys and challenges, and I was there to laugh, cry, encourage, and pray with him. Most of the time, I simply listened. Sometimes, that’s all people need—just to be heard and reminded that they are not alone.

Noey was far from perfect. He faced battles, both internal and external, that he worked through daily. But one thing I always knew for sure: he deeply loved his daughters, Jordyn and Emery. They were the light of his life, second only to God.

One unforgettable day, Noey visited me in Hawaii, and I took him into the ocean. The waters near the shore were rough that day. Noey hesitated, unsure about venturing in. I told him that the waters might seem chaotic at first, but if we kept swimming past the breaking waves, it would eventually become calm and clear. I reminded him that life is often like that—chaotic and unclear at first, but if we keep moving forward, the peace and clarity will come.

At first, Noey struggled against the waves. He fought the current, but I gently reminded him that it’s easier to go with the flow. Yet, when the ground beneath us was unstable and we lost control, fear took over. Noey almost gave up and turned back. I could see the panic in his eyes. But with a firm hand, I pulled him forward. Eventually, we passed the breaking point, and the ocean revealed its beauty—vibrant colors, graceful sea creatures, and the serene glow of sunlight piercing through the water. Noey realized that what had initially been frightening and uncertain was now breathtaking and peaceful.

That day, we created a memory I will forever cherish. Noey’s experience in the ocean changed him. It gave him a new perspective on life, and ever since, he was determined to give his daughters that same experience. We talked about it often. He dreamed of bringing Jordyn and Emery to Hawaii one day to share the same lessons he’d learned: to embrace the chaos, keep moving forward, and discover the beauty on the other side.

Noey’s love for his girls reminds me of God’s love for us. God, the perfect Father, just wants to be with us and for us to know His love.

I spoke briefly with Noey on the day he took his life. We were actively planning for him to visit me in Hawaii. We had talked about it many times, and I even helped him book a ticket. It devastates me that he never made the trip.

Though Noey is no longer physically with us, his memory will forever live in my heart. He made me a better person, though he may not have known it. Whenever I’m on a long drive, I think of him. Whenever I see a Toyota Land Cruiser or a Ford Raptor, I think of him. And whenever I witness the tender love of a father for his children, I think of Noey. There was nothing he wanted more than to be with his daughters.

One day, I still hope to take Jordyn and Emery into the ocean. I want to do it for Noey.

My friends, let us love while we still have life. Let us live in gratitude for every blessing, big and small. Let us be kind to one another and do everything we can to support one another. Life is too short to hold onto bitterness. It’s better lived in love and compassion. So let’s make every moment count. Let’s stop living in the regrets of the past or the worries of the future. Let’s embrace the precious gift of today and trust God with the rest.

And remember, in the end, that which was chaotic, scary, and unclear will become calm, peaceful, and make perfect sense. Sometimes, God just has to take us by the hand and pull us past our worries and fears. If we trust Him and go with Him, we’ll experience His wonders in the deep waters—and we’ll be changed for eternity.

Sleep on, my dear friend Noey. Rest in peace and in God’s love. We will never forget you. You will always be in our hearts. There are no forever goodbyes. Until we meet again, my friend. Long live Noey!